PREVIOUS REVIEWS
If you are curious on reading my previous TFP episode reviews, you can find 'em all in the Archive here.
PREVIOUS SEASON THREE REVIEWS:
Darkmount, NV
As always, SPOILERSTRANSFORMERS PRIME, EPISODE 54: "SCATTERED"
Or "The Excellent Adventures of Starscream and Shockwave."
"Shockwave and I weren't intimate. ...except that one time."
When we last left off, the Autobots were still separated while the Cons partied-hardied all night. Soundwave DJed them some killer Daft Punk tunes and Knock Out hit on everyone - not always drunkenly, mind you. Arcee and Jack took center stage last episode, so "Scattered" now focuses on Miko/Bulkhead and Raf/Bumblebee.
The first team involves Wheeljack just being his motherfucking badass self. Using Vehicons as makeshift hoverboards to escape Darkmount is crazy awesome and once more, he easily steals the show. Seriously, this guy is badass balls-on-the-wall fantastic. But as much POW! as he delivers, I'm glad he's also smart. He knows Starscream planted a tracking device and successfully uses that against him (in the most explodey way possible, but I'm not complaining.) Bulkhead and Miko are second players, leaving Wheeljack to do his own thang. Given how many episodes are left and with the stakes even higher, I'm guessing Wheeljack is going to be a permanent member of the team now instead of lollygagging offscreen
If the Bulkhead/Miko side of the story (and let's face, neither of these two really do much in the episode) handles the action portion of the story, Raf and Bumblebee balances it out with the pathos. Unsurprisingly, it deals with Ratchet. The two locate him in a junkyard where the poor medic just wants to live the rest of his life in misery. It's an appropriate place for him to mope because he certainly feels like shit. The best scene—THE best—in "Darkest Hour" occurs after Optimus destroyed the Omega Keys. Ratchet is not only frustrated when he hears about this, but devastated and goes out of his way to chew them out. Never mind that Optimus did it to save Earth (which noticeably is not dying…well, not as much as Cybertron), all that hope to restore Cyberton is officially kaput because they lost their one and only chance. I liked that neither Optimus nor Ratchet were in the wrong or right. Ratchet has a point, Optimus could and should have considered a third option instead of getting pissed and diving straight in without thinking straight. Yet I get how he feels; the couple of episodes prior had the Cons being dealt a silver plate and Optimus is just fed up with this bullshit. Tellingly, he keeps this attitude in "Darkmount, NV" with his "no hope" comment, though slowly dying would kinda put a damper on things. Ratchet in retaliation blames the Autobots for fucking up Cybertron forever despite Earth's immediate danger, but at no point in the episode does the narrative ever call him out on it. He's treated sympathetic because he has a magnificently good point and because I think he's allowed to be angry. Transformers Prime is so governed with its black and white morality (and clumsily at that) that this is a nice shade of gray. Beautifully, they carry this to "Scattered." Ratchet is still bitter and upset, but I also like that he still has respect for Optimus. Without a commander, what's the bloody point? Ratchet's back on board some ten minutes later, but it's a gripping emotional scene. Damn it Ratchet, why must you always suffer?
Smokescreen and Optimus still derp around. Who the fuck cares?
I totally dig Starscream's new role. Let's see, Season One had Starscream briefly take Megatron's throne where he tried to usurp and rule in vain while Mr. Space Madness had a bad case of Plot Coma. He utterly failed and eventually fled the Cons out of disgust. Season Two sadly had him at his lowest point when he tried to do the whole solo thing, only to fail even more. His comedic butt monkey role only increased from here and has yet to leave. Also, need I remind you Season Two had SCOOTER RIDING STARSCREAM? He returns to the Decepticons in the most awesome way possible regardless and later proved he still has loyalties to the Con clan.
What could they do for Season Three? I figured they'd just go back to status quo and have Starscream slowly resume his backstabbing ways against Megatron. Hell, I still think this is a possibility because Starscream, but the writers managed to squeeze out a new role for him while maintaining his ego and treacherous nature: competition. Megatron divides his chain of command between Starscream (military) and Shockwave (science) and Jesus Holy Christ on a toaster, Starscream suuuuuucks at his job. Megatron, why did you keep him alive again? Do you miss the sex that badly? Shockwave is winning Megatron's favor much more successfully and he's doing it competently. The best part is, Shockwave doesn't see the rivalry Starscream is building up and even if he did, he doesn't give a shit. Damn it, it's always Starscream's turn on the catwalk!
Starscream is still a pathetic loser and while I don't think he's fallen as far as Season Two (yet, anything is possible, but it's hard to get any lower than Flightless Scooter Starscream), I think it's pretty evident that the Serious Badass Starscream of Season One is officially dead and buried. That's a damn shame because while I enjoy funny, expressive Starscream (the beginning animation has him at his liveliest, if not suffering Rubber Mouth Syndrome yet again), it at least balanced itself by making him a fearsome foe. And GODDAMN IT HE FUCKING MENTIONED CLIFFJUMPER'S DEATH AGAIN! I will never understand why the show think this is funny enough to be a running gag because it fucking is NOT. It demeans Starscream's villain credibility back when he actually was a legitimate threat and it demeans Cliffjumper's death. Fuck that running gag! Fuck it to the ground! At least Knock Out had the decency to call him out on it because FUCK THIS SHIT. FACE PALM PROWL NOW!
Also I still don't like Shockwave's voice. It's not bad and it works for this Shockwave, but it's not creepy. It has none of that crafty British lure that Corey Burton delivered for his Shockwaves. I can't say if TFP Shockwave will provide the scary shit like he did in "Out of the Past", so I don't know. However, I don't like the tone of it either. The actor seems to be reaching for a robotic feel, but he never quite gets to that level of stoicism.
Goddamn, Jasper's destruction did wonders for the background. This whole damn show's environment is 95% gray and brown. And purple/black for the Cons. It gets super boring after a while. Now that the Autobots are on the move, the animators actually had to make different backgrounds and they're gorgeous. My favorites include the field of corn as well as the sunset that engulfs Arcee and Jack, the flower garden where Miko and Bulkhead resides, and some of the forestry surrounding it.
Oooooh.
Oooooooooooooooooh!
I don't think it's as magnificently pretty as the autumn setting in "Hard Knocks", but Holy Shit, look at the colors! They actually have fucking palettes! It's just...I've never seen so much green before in my life that isn't Bulkhead's big robotic ass.
The end of the episode leaves off with a cliffhanger as they introduce two new elements from each faction. The Autobots get Ultra Magnus while the Decepticons provides the more awesome, showy Predaking. I told myself I would never, ever, ever, ever, eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeever get his toy.
…
Voyager Predaking toy is goddamn awesome and I love it because it's so well made and holy crap, ROBOT DRAGON.
Any who, good episode. Happy Zombie Jesus Day, y'all.
OUT OF FIVEBONUS OBSERVATIONS
LANGUAGE GIBBERISH: The website with the blurry photo of Ratchet looks like this:
What the hell? What Earth language is that? Nobody couldn't bother to write something on that thing? It doesn't even have to be words, just the basic alphabets. Maybe it's a secret message the animators left for fans to decode. Well, internet linguist nerds; get on that shit and report back to me!
BECAUSE WE CAN'T SEE HIM ENOUGH: What was the whole point of pulling the camera ultra close to Wheeljack while he drives towards Bulkhead and Miko? We know it's him and not an enemy. What kind of intensity are they trying to establish?
DDR: Raf uses his foot to push buttons on the Harbringer's main computer, it is super adorable.
CNA: I'm assuming all the other Cons know, but I like that Knock Out was the first to point out the CNA on screen because hey, he's a doctor—he's a bot of science, too!
IT'S MY TURN TO STAND NEXT TO SANTA: So why is Knock Out standing next to Megatron and his throne when Shockwave is presenting Predaking? Starscream and Soundwave are both up front. Shouldn't Starscream be the one next to Megatron? Or hell, shouldn't Soundwave just out of loyalty? Christ, what have I come to? I'm criticizing command positioning arrangements.
BEST LINE: "Careful, Starscream, you may dislocate a landing gear patting yourself on the back."
Again, it's all about delivery. Sassy Knock Out is Sassy and he calls out Starscream's Cliffjumper bullshit.
WORST LINE (Maybe): "Scattered to the winds..." When Arcee picks up dirt and lets the wind carry it, she utters that line. I'm honestly torn between thinking it's balls cheesy (notice the show again said the episode title) to actually being somewhat poignant and beautiful. It helps that the sunset is gorgeous and the cornfield is a welcoming set of greens and differing scenario than all of brown/gray Jasper. I don't know, I'm mixed.
________________________________________________________________________________________________
STUPID FANCOMICSDiscovery (A Transformers Animated Fancomic): Read the entire thing here. More updated as the series progresses. Placed there for archival purpose.
Chess Piece (A Danny Phantom Fancomic):
An AU Danny Phantom comic. It's been canceled, but for those morbidly curious to read this convoluted train wreck, the link is here.
OTHER STUFFArchive
If you ever want a list of links to all the reviews/rants/analysis/time-wasters I wrote.
My Twitter: Follow me ramble in 100+ words or less here.
My Tumblr: Lots of pretty pictures I like. I may also submit sketches of "Discovery" that I won't put on DA.
Ask Crescendolls on Tumblr: Ask those four losers (and their cats) whatever you want.
"Discovery" TVTropes Page: I actually didn't make this TVTropes page. Someone else did and that person has my eternal thanks. So I'm promoting it because, well, it's my fancomic. XD
REQUESTS: No, I do not. Sorry.
