ATTENTION EVERYONE, PLEASE NOTICE THE OBNOXIOUSLY LARGE SENTENCE.
CLICK ON THIS LINK TO BRING HAPPINESS: www.seibertron.com/transformer…
Transformers Animated is coming to The Hub. This is the most relevant and bestest everest news in existence. No other can compare and anyone who said so is lying. LYIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING! One can only hope with TFA finally out of Cartoon Network's grip, it can get Shout!Factory's attention and give it the full boxed set DVD it deserves. Also, maybe push IDW to bring fucking Season Four in comic format. Pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease.
PREVIOUS REVIEWS
TRANSFORMERS PRIME SEASON 2 AND RESCUE BOTS SEASON 1 (DEVIANTART JOURNAL LINKS)
Links to my DA review of the respective shows.
TFP Episode 27 "Orion Pax: Part 1" Review
TFP Episode 28, "Orion Pax: Part 2" Review & TBR Episode 3 "Hotshots" Review
TFP Episode 29, "Orion Pax: Part 3" Review & TRB Episode 4, "Flobsters On Parade" Review
TFP Episode 30, "Operation Bumblebee, Part 1" Review & TRB Episode 5 "The Alien Invasion of Griffin Rock" Review
TFP Episode 31 Operation Bumblebee, Part 2" Review & TRB Episode 6 "Cody On Patrol" Review
TFP Episode 32 "Loose Cannons" Review
TFP Episode 33 "Crossfire" Review
TFP Episode 34 "Nemesis Prime" Review
TFP Episode 35, "Grill" Review & TRB Episode 7, "Four Bots and A Baby" Review
TFP Episode 36, "Armada" Review & TRB Episode 8, "Walk On The Wild Side" Review
TFP Episode 37, "Flying Mind" Review & TRB Episode 9, "Christmas In July" Review
TFP Episode 38, "Tunnel Vision" Review & TRB Episode 10, "Deep Trouble" Review
TFP Episode 39, "Triangulation" Review & TRB Episode 11, "Return of the Dinobot"
TRB Episode 12+13, "The Other Doctor" and "The Reign of Morocco"
TRP Episode 40, "Toxicity" Review
SPOILERS
TRANSFORMERS RESCUE BOTS, EPISODE 14: "SMALL BLESSINGS"
Or "No, I'm not going to make a Honey, I shrunk the Kids reference or joke. ...DAMN!
Well, it had to happen. Eventually there had to be an episode of Rescue Bots I wouldn't like.
Enter "Small Blessings". The plot synopsis of the Rescue Bots literally going down to size sounds like pure - if not gimmicky - fun. Sadly, the overall package is clumsy. The thing is, the actual shrinking plot is handled well and shows three of the Rescue Bots (Chase doesn't get shrunk and totally gets gypped – he needs his own episode, damn it) struggling to handle their current dilemma as well as fix today's Disaster of the Day (actually, they rescue Kade while Cody handles the dam issue, but they technically rescued someone, so it totally counts). Everything else is a mess.
"Small Blessing" squeezes in a plot that largely works better on its own. Kade's guilt over potentially losing Heatwave after how he treated him earlier doesn't work when both Blades and Boulder shrunk alongside him. Dani and Graham are just as upset and the story as a whole works best as an ensemble piece than overall focus on one major character.
And that's not getting into the rather contrived narrative during the middle portion when the video cameras are not only conveniently out so Cody can't immediately identity the Minimizer, but the cast using terms like "disappear", "turn invisible", and other related description so they won't find the answer so easily because, hey, plot has to keep going. It also takes a good nine minutes before the actual shrinking occurs, so there's a lot of time wasted building up the plots.
Kade is also a total asshole here, treating Heatwave like dirt. There's actually a justification because his cockiness shoots several meters high in order to impress his crush, Hayley. Frankly, I'm surprised she even has a name. She doesn't speak whatsoever in the entire episode (a gasp and giggle does not count) and serves as a flat plot device to drive Kade's jerkiness. I wouldn't be surprised if she never appears again, but I digress. My initial point is that it's perfectly within Kade's character to be an even bigger dipstick when it comes to love. Love makes people do stupid things and Kade is already a douchey moron, so his callousness can be argued for. However, his overall behavior is severely exaggerated (who keeps a poster of himself?! That's ridiculous!) and almost hostile. Because this episode came right after his heartfelt speech with Heatwave, it's jarring. The real kicker occurred when Kade angrily tells Heatwave that he shouldn't think, he should be ordered. That's…That's fucking awful. I don't expect ever episode to be pitch perfect in their consistence (even if I will complain about it XD), but this is a low blow even for Kade. At this point, it contradicts a lot of the growth he and Heatwave has grown through. Why do I feel like the script was written to take place before Dr. Morocco's arrival?
The one good thing I can say about "Small Blessings" is that if this is the only episode of Rescue Bots (so far out of currently fifteen aired) that gets a bad reaction out of me, then it's still doing a damn good job.
OUT OF FIVE STARSBONUS OBSERVATIONS
LOVE BEYOND ALIEN MEANS: The concept of romance love being a foreign thing to these robots bothers me because love is not only a vague term, but something the robots clearly have. True, no one is romantically involved and I doubt there's going to be an actual romance for the Bots, but they express it through friendship and teamwork. So yeah, I do think romance love isn't far off. Not to mention this is a primary staple that has appeared in past TF work. People can argue it may not exist for this particular franchise, BUT since this is confirmed to be in the same continuity as Transformers Prime, Cybertronian love totally exists; Ratchet flirted with Arcee in "Stronger, Faster!"
Then again, this could just be the humans assuming otherwise. I'm bringing it up because Heatwave doesn't bother correcting either Kade or Cody when they talk about this subject as if the series is giving the indication that romance doesn't exist in their world. Then again, I don't know if Heatwave really is the best bot to talk about romantic love. ...Aw, hell, we all know he's thinking about Blades.
THE LATEST "DETAIL:" Blades is excited to get "detailed". I think he and Tracks will get along swimmingly.
CAMERA GLOVES: Actually, that's a pretty cool invention, the gloves are just fugly. Also, Doc made it, so it probably has radiation inside it or something.
DEAR GOD, THERE ARE MICRO-SCRAPLETS?! That sounds horrifying.
OLD RED: What th—Kade has his old truck? Last episode made it sound like he didn't. Where the fuck did he get that back?
ROADS ARE 2-DIMENSIONAL: When Heatwave, Blades, and Boulder are being chased by Kade's old fire truck, they run away so they won't be crushed by its wheels. It never occurs to any of them to, ya know, drive between the wheels. They're ridiculously small enough that it should work.
BEST LINE: "When human men and women get together, their brains just seem to stop working."
"Hard to tell with your brother."
Heatwave gets the best insults. Pwned.
WORST LINE: None
TRANSFORMERS RESCUE BOTS, EPISODE 15: "GRIFFIN ROCK TRIANGLE"
Or "I am Dr. Anna Baranova, and I'm here to ask you a question: "Is a scientist not entitled to initial a crazy ass plan?"
"No," says the Doctor in Griffin Rock, "Because I have a crazier plan."
"No," says the cop with the mustache, "Because I control Griffin Rock and I'm going to smite a giant ass robot on you."
"No," says the Red Rescue Man, "Because - wait, why do I care? Go do your crazy ass thing."
I rejected those answers. Instead, I chose something different... I chose the impossible... I chose...
MIDGARD!"
In contrast to "Small Blessings", "Griffon Rock Triangle" is a much better episode. It's exceptionally suspenseful and mysterious. Even after a huge event with Dr. Morcocco, this smaller, sedated episode still manage to draw me in. We may not be getting anything significant or that big of a game changer like the former, but it slowly and effectively moves its plot that we do care when the cast wonders what the hell is going on and how they can solve the mystery. It gradually and successfully builds up the current puzzle - this so-called "Griffin Rock Triangle" where ships disappear and never returns and later, a scientist who tried to stop it, only to vanish as well. Once the riddle is solved, the rest surprised me. The story shifts into something a little more poignant, a little more sad.
Dr. Anna Baranova is a fascinating character and you truly get the sense of tragedy this poor woman underwent. How she survived twenty-eight years without going insane I don't know, but though she's not performing horrific experiments (or maybe she once was, but then got bored of it and went totally sane XD), she sees herself as a defeated woman who has since content with her fate. Having failed her plans and with no means to leave, she slowly had to accept the inevitable and dear GOD, it sounds awful. I already have a slight clastrophobic nature and I can't swim, so the thought of living in a station surrounded by water that I will fucking drown in if I attempt to escape is awful enough, but with no one to keep in contact, the best I'll do is talk to fishes until I die. The garden must have been a godsend to her; forcing her to tend to it and keep a hobby so she won't axe-murder anyone who comes for her. And the kicker is that she's grown so accustomed to her humble little home that the thought of leaving let alone carrying out her original plan (and thus destroying the station) is offensive - she has a dining table with tea and plates in her garden, for fuck's sake. I actually kind of wish they had left her alone and leave her to her own device, but I'm asking for a bittersweet (maybe downer) ending on a cartoon designed for preschoolers. But it is clear that she has mulled over her failure and would like to conclude it - after all, she IS tenacious - she just can't pull it off so easily now because she's grown accustomed to her base. The only major flaw is that Cody managed to sway her so easily with one sentence. That's it? One kid and his inspiring words is enough to change her mind? I guess if I had to provide a good reason, it's because she admires his determination, but still, that was too easy. My good condolences to Kath Soucie who gives Dr. Baranova a heavy, tired voice.
Needless to say, it looks like she'll be a new addition to the cast. Good, I hope we see more from her. Kind of a shame they immediately hint of a romantic pairing with Doc Greene instead of, say, Charlie Burns (if anything because I'm kind of curious what happened to Mrs. Burns). It just seems too predictable. Otherwise, I really wish I had more to say.
AND A HALF OUT OF FIVEBONUS OBSERVATIONS
SANTA CLAUS?
You lost weight.
"I AM SO NOT A MORNING PERSON" You, me, and Korra, dear.
ANNNNND CUT: This is the first episode where the theme song is reduced. Good, the song sucks.
FREE AIR: Ain't no way the humans can breathe underwater inside the Rescue Bots. If these guys don't even have air conditioner or heaters, there is no way they will have built-in oxygen for the humans. Especially since, ya know, they don't need it.
OKAY, FUNNIEST SCENE EVER: Cody tries to fish out a plate and puts on his most serious game face as he does so. His expression never changes and he isn't even remotely fazed when a lobster tries to snap his little fingers off. Pfft, such a beautiful little moment.
MIDGARD: Admit it; you were thinking this, too.
Midgard is indeed part of Norse mythology. The serpent circling the world is Jörmungandr, holding his tail in its mouth. From what I briefly researched, it's said when he finally releases himself, Ragnarok will begin and he will poison the land and sea. But don't worry, Thor's gonna totally kick his ass.
Once he finishes eating.
"FILM IS SO LAST CENTURY" Doncha know we torrent our shit now?
GRIFFIN ROCK NEVER CHANGES: Oh, god and it's Cody who said this. The Burns family probably has some rigid grip on this island and change is seen as a bad thing. Oh, god.
DOUBLE OH GOD! Doc Greene and Dr. Anna Baranova working together. This island is doomed.
BEST LINE: "I suggest Tunnel 15 be sealed off; I have hazard tape in my glove box."
OF COURSE HE DOES. XD
WORST LINE: None.
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I'm going to try and not be lazy and create an Index Journal that archives all these links so it doesn't gobble up 1/3 of the damn blog.
TRANSFORMERS PRIME TOONZONE REVIEWS
These are the links to the Transformers Prime recaps I do over at the Toonzone blog. They're generally more condensed forms of the reviews I do here (except no foul language XD), so for those who thinks my reviews on DA are tl;dr, you can always check these out. Also, shameless promotion and all.
SEASON ONE
1 -5. Darkness Rising Review
6. Masters and Students
7. Scrapheap
8. Con Job
9. Convoy
10. Dues Ex Machina
11. Speed Metal
12. Predatory
13. Sick Mind
14. Out of His Head
15. Shadowzone
16. Operation: Breakdown
17. Crisscross
18. Metal Attraction
19. Rock Bottom
20. Partners (NOT REVIEWED YET)
21. T.M. I (NOT REVIEWED YET)
22. Stronger, Faster (NOT REVIEWED YET)
23. One Shall Fall (NOT REVIEWED YET)
24. One Shall Rise: Part 1
25. One Shall Rise: Part 2
26. One Shall Rise: Part 3
SEASON TWO:
27. Orion Pax: Part 1
27. Orion Pax: Part 2
29. Orion Pax: Part 3
30. Operation Bumblebee: Part 1
31. Operation Bumblebee: Part 2
32. Loose Cannons
33. Crossfire
34. Nemesis Prime
35. Grill
36. Armada
37. Flying Mind
38. Tunnel Vision
39. Triangulation
40. Triage
41. Toxicity
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STUPID FANCOMICSDiscovery (A Transformers Animated Fancomic): Read the entire thing here. More updated as the series progresses. Placed there for archival purpose.
Chess Piece (A Danny Phantom Fancomic):
An AU Danny Phantom comic. It's been canceled, but for those morbidly curious to read this convoluted train wreck, the link is here.
OTHER STUFFMy Twitter: Follow me ramble in 100+ words or less here.
My Tumblr: Lots of pretty pictures I like. I may also submit sketches of "Discovery" that I won't put on DA.
Ask Crescendolls on Tumblr: Ask those four losers (and their cats) whatever you want.
"Discovery" TVTropes Page: I actually didn't make this TVTropes page. Someone else did and that person has my eternal thanks. So I'm promoting it because, well, it's my fancomic. XD
REQUESTS: No, I do not. Sorry.
